This page is a direct response to one angry
Twilight fan's question of, "WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU THAT YOU
THINK YOU CAN HATE ON TWILIGHT?!"
There are two questions here. Who am I? My
name is Captain Awesome. Or Greg Porter. Whichever.
The bigger question is, who cares? You do, that’s
who! Why? Because I am awesome and you have come to the best website on Earth.
I am a 21 year old college student with a major in graphic design
and a minor in creative writing. Granted, the writing on
this website isn’t exactly what I will be submitting for my
senior research paper but it will suffice for the subject
matter.
I’m an avid reader and writer of fantasy fiction which is
why I created this website to begin with. Actually, this
website is here because of Stephenie Meyer. Her writing is
so off the wall terrible that I felt the need to write a
ten-page review about why her series is so fucking terrible.
This website was born out of hatred for stupidity and I
will make it my mission to bring that stupidity to light and
smite it down to the hell hole where it came from.
It’s a dog eat dog world out there… and I’m a killer
whale…. eating delicious, delicious penguins.
To recap: I am a student, an author, an
artist, and a killer whale. See, let me break this down.
I am educated. I already have something over the general
demographic of Twilight fans. I'm an author and poet.
. I am an artist. My art and what I do is extremely
important to me. Twilight is not art. Twilight is, in fact,
the opposite of art. Twilight is complete shit. I am a
killer whale. As such, I tore Twilight to shreds.
Enjoy :D
Several penguins were likely killed in the
making of this photograph
|
